corvidmurtazin

timurmurtazin:

aight since everyone is yeeting off tumblr I might as well jump on the bandwagon

Twitter: https://twitter.com/TimurRGB
Discord: Timurmurtazin#1797

candyredterezii:

variou-very:

this is that jevil dude everyones been talking about, yeah?

no it’s this guy

oppa-homeless-style:

chefpyro:

I’ve been in this IT course for like 2 years now and while I’ve learned a lot about computers they still haven’t gotten to the clown

I’m going to break you into four equal parts like a fucking kit kat

chefpyro:

chefpyro:

good thing this here internet box exists. back in the 12th century or whatever i would have had to shout my bullshit from the window

me hanging out my window in the dead of night, 1127 AD: I HAVE TWELVE TOES AND SEVEN EYES

a guardsman, already aiming for my nuts with his crossbow: SHUT YON FUCKETH MOUTH

chefpyro:

my cat: *grabs my hand the same way felines in the wild use to snap their prey’s neck*

me: aww. you think you can kill me? fool. you are far too weak to challenge me. i love you

honl:

Homestucks and furries slipping under the radar since tumblr is censoring porn based off fleshtones:

kitty:

*sniff* *sniff*

positive-memes:

This is NUCKING FUTZ!!

thatonequeerkid:

vandigo:

kimreesesdaughter:

nickionthemtittieswhenisignit:

nappyhurrdontcare:

kimreesesdaughter:

kimreesesdaughter:

On some real shit, I do not fuck with people who ride those boat things at the carnival. People who get on those do not give a fuck about life, they don’t care about you, ya mama or your kids. They literally have nothing to lose. You don’t care about life so there’s no need for me to fight you because you’re not going to give a damn about my face.

THIS JOINT!!!!

BITCHHHHHHH. I got on this shit when I was 12. Wasn’t no bar, no protection, nothing in that shit. I didn’t realize until it was too late. You couldn’t pay me to ever get on this shit ever again in my life. We were in Landover, this shit almost smooth flipped my ass to Baltimore. No. Never again.

12? I got on this bitch when I was 21 and had my head in my ex’s shoulder the ENTIRE time. Screaming like a bih too. Nope. Never again. I was praying to the gravity gods the entire time.

?????? All it does is swing back and forth???? I don’t understand the concern??????

centrifugal force keeps you in your seat.

Centrifugal force isn’t keeping me from crying tho

goosemixtapes:

me, 0.2 seconds after arriving in the good place, waving my arms like i’m flagging down a taxi: janet. janet janet janet janet

janet, appearing beside me with her customer service smile: yes, max goosemixtapes?

me: the author of my immortal. was she genuine or